I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
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