It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
this beer tastes like vomit already
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Parade of Dicks...that's what I'm calling 2017
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
