Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Rain ponchos don't count as shirts at the bar. FYI.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
I'm just that drunk tells people I love them or wants to set them on fire. Accept that.
I have a bad feeling I'm going to like this fuck buddy
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
Randomize