I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Well I kept shouting "you're groovy" at him and then I had a 15-minute argument with the bouncer about how many 9s there are in 100... it was definitely time to go home.
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
