In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
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