i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
