ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
Hungover. Be in at noonish. Turn my monitor on and put a hot cup of coffee on my desk so the boss thinks I'm in
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
Randomize
