Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
how convenient is it that the kid i'm fucking lives right next to planned parenthood?
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
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