Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Please tell me you are a size medium in men's clown onesies and that you forgot them here last night.....
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
Randomize
