her vagine was all disorganized.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
What is the protocol for an "i'm sorry I had my ex retrieve me from the bar so I didn't drive drunk" blow job
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
There are only families here. I'm at the bar alone double fisting drinks. You cannot get any more approachable than I am now.
The whole movie was ruined when some chick started laughing with what you could tell was QUITE the mouthful. This of course made the guy laugh harder.
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
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