it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
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