YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
