You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
I just want you to sit on my face and to tell you you're pretty. Most girls would leap at this opportunity.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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