just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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