Wow my backseat really seemed a lot bigger when we were 16
her tits were misleading. turns out she wasn't cool, smart and funny
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I woke up this morning to my panties draped around the neck of an empty bottle of bulleit. That is the perfect visual metaphor for my life at this juncture.
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
Randomize