My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
I smell like Captain Morgan and tears
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I ended up at home with a random bird sculpture and flowers
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
