People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
PS I almost downloaded grindr to see if any guys wanted to buy me chinese food..
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Randomize
