i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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