OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Randomize
