: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
Plan B is the new Plan A
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
And then I told him since the day he walked away to get over what I went through he lost the boyfriend right to ask why my bed is broken.
I take full pride in being the one that broke ur bed. Want to go for the sofa?
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
He uses Bing as his search engine...but he's great in bed. So obviously I'm torn.
Randomize
