names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
Tiger Woods should have just walked in, gave everyone a high five, and left.
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
you're good to come back. The bouncer pulled me aside and told me. He also said you have nothing to worry about and that you have an awesome "upper punch" or some shit
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
