i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
You think if I promise to behave for the rest of my life, god will let me fuck her on the regular?
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
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