So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Had to claim I'd "gone lesbian" to get my cat back. Thank God I got away from that one.
Randomize
