He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Bunch of Navy warships just sailed into New York Harbor for Fleet Week. Nobodys getting laid this weekend.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
