I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Mischief managed.
YOU ARE NOT A MARAUDER, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO NOW?
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
I'm bleeding and have questions
Like I'll lick your nuts to make you feel better if you don't get it
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize
