Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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