we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I bought 2 40s with winning lottery tickets and they paid me $.03. 'Merica
Tornado booty call.. dedication
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
PS: I just woke up from my shower
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
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