I'm jealous of your bromance
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
We've been staking out a taco bell for 2 hours trying to find last night's one night stand
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
He's on the porch naked. Help.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
Randomize