Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
He has the fingertips of a God
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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