i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
either way he was missing a nipple.
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
girl pulled up to the stop sign, got out, threw up all over my hood said happy thanksgiving then drove off
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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