My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
gave myself the "you're a really good girlfriend" talk on the way to where i intentionally cheated on him. i am my own drunken therapist.
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
