Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
He goes "what would you say if I told you I like to get it in?" def a potential soulmate right there.
Randomize
