Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
"Don't get as drunk as I was on my birthday" has been upgraded from a goal for Friday night to a goal for my life in general.
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Ask me if I'm sitting naked in a lawn chair eating a block of cheese waiting for a bacon grilled cheese sandwich
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Randomize
