Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I left two hundred in singles in your car sorry about the mess
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
