After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
All she gave me for breakfast was raw toast. How can she expect me to eat raw toast?
You mean bread?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
I got a phone call from security asking me to do my laundry wearing more than a blanket next time.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
He turned down jacuzzi sex. He cares more about my vagina than i do.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
I ended up in a bathroom giving my hymen a pep talk
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize
