I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Ladies don't puke and tell
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
Randomize
