Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
we watched a guy take a shot of tequila while riding a unicycle
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Heard flapping noises behind me. It was my roommate flapping her bathrobe like wings, saying "I'm a faaaiiiiry."
so i might have slept on your bathroom floor last night...
Randomize
