Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Pretty sure I just heard the turkey yell "don't put me in there" as it was going in the oven. way too high for this holiday.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Randomize
