so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Peed on my phone. Dried it out in oven. Technology is both a plus and a minus.
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
So I get to my parents and walk in the door so my mom knows I'm safe and alive and my grandpa looks at me and says "were you being someone's bitch". And I about died of laughter
Wow, he seems so solid
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize