Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
Life lesson: using the oven as a heater= $500 electric bill
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I'm literally naked with a whole pizza in my lap sitting in my chair.
Randomize
