Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
There is a banner on a house by campus that says "welcome to college dads. Thanks for dropping off your daughters!"
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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