Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
Its officially tradition: I black out every year on michael jackson's death day..
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Randomize
