Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I can't wait to get all this Makers out of my shoe.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
College: when you have to set an alarm to start drinking
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
It was great. They teamed up to hit on these two frat boys all night, until the frat boys started making out with each other. The looks on their faces...
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
FUCK WHALES
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
