Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Sober December ended when I found beer behind my bed...I lost $2000 but spent 6 hours sober. Meet me at the bar?
Okay. I really need to get out of this guys bed and get home. It's two in the afternoon. He's not even HERE.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Either he pets my cat or this deal is null
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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