This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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