Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
just found out that she named her cat after me.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
He stopped mid thrust ... To check snap chat .. From his roomie
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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