Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
since we're both too lazy to go to each others house, you drink there, i'll drink here and we'll skype. it's the same thing.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Dude I walked in to my house just to be handed a bottle of vodka by my sister. She then said i had 15 minutes to finish it. Moving into my parents place is the best choice I have made this year.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Still losing my voice, so I am trying to get it back through drugs. Welcome to my Monday logic.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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