I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Just puked in the monkey exhibit at the zoo. They ate it. I don't want a pet monkey anymore.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
What! You have to go to class. Otherwise, you're wasting money that could have been spent on weed. Gotta get that shit in perspective.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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