it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
I miss waking up knowing you're passed out under my bed.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize