I feel great
I just peed on a car
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
I get a little bitchy. We all know that
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
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